My nipple is on Facebook.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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