What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
