just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
