Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Someone came in the potted fern
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
