My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
