Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize