I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
His nipple licking is glorious
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
