when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize