yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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