Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
