I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
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