i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize
