Pregnant stripper...not hot.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
