That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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