i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize
