We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
