He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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