As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
