I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Oh god it's open bar.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
