Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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