There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize