Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
