A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
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So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
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Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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