the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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