he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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