2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Randomize
