Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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