Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events http://tfl.nu/1mgv
  Replies (7) Good night (860) Bad night (1247)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  worms taste like bacon by the way.

  (1-813): View more from Florida

  I always wondered what they tasted like.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): worms taste like bacon by the way. (1-813): I always wondered what they tasted like. http://tfl.nu/a7qy
  Replies (9) Good night (1264) Bad night (3225)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant. http://tfl.nu/q6o4
  Replies (19) Good night (1138) Bad night (9042)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend. http://tfl.nu/j59u
  Replies (4) Good night (1929) Bad night (2954)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match http://tfl.nu/pm5g
  Replies (11) Good night (4280) Bad night (1368)
• Favorite

  (772): View more from Florida

  it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (772): it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night http://tfl.nu/3jc9
  Replies (13) Good night (2378) Bad night (1818)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool. http://tfl.nu/9aum
  Replies (12) Good night (3108) Bad night (966)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love! http://tfl.nu/kaje
  Replies (9) Good night (4697) Bad night (828)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (205): Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine? http://tfl.nu/l4l5
  Replies (17) Good night (1365) Bad night (731)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag http://tfl.nu/rjsr
  Replies (6) Good night (1422) Bad night (529)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.

  (1-314): View more from Missouri

  Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault. (1-314): Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush. http://tfl.nu/fjsh
  Replies (5) Good night (1260) Bad night (613)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec. (541): Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY. http://tfl.nu/zkog
  Replies (4) Good night (276) Bad night (699)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow http://tfl.nu/q4cz
  Replies (3) Good night (761) Bad night (187)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night? http://tfl.nu/hlmk
  Replies (5) Good night (669) Bad night (193)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts. http://tfl.nu/2gw3
  Replies (1) Good night (245) Bad night (326)

Randomize