Texts From Last Night

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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Being persistent has its perks my friend.

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  (609): I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking. (215): Being persistent has its perks my friend. http://tfl.nu/wzcm
  Replies (11) Good night (3727) Bad night (543)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.

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  (973): she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle. http://tfl.nu/83v8
  Replies (5) Good night (2526) Bad night (577)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song

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  (253): To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song http://tfl.nu/rtr4
  Replies (17) Good night (2600) Bad night (835)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.

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  (480): Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles. http://tfl.nu/jmsm
  Replies (32) Good night (15265) Bad night (871)
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  (619): View more from California

  just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.

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  (619): just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing. http://tfl.nu/ezjd
  Replies (16) Good night (5363) Bad night (926)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.

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  (703): Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor. http://tfl.nu/fx2a
  Replies (4) Good night (2951) Bad night (1895)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads

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  (715): Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads http://tfl.nu/v7qu
  Replies (10) Good night (1942) Bad night (1173)
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  (209): View more from California

  I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.

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  (209): I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that. http://tfl.nu/8ygm
  Replies (3) Good night (2468) Bad night (928)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.

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  (774): Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America. http://tfl.nu/x41k
  Replies (3) Good night (2206) Bad night (614)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.

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  (520): Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this. http://tfl.nu/0jj8
  Replies (8) Good night (925) Bad night (1736)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.

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  (306): This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks. http://tfl.nu/6laj
  Replies (4) Good night (1779) Bad night (383)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."

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  (512): You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid." http://tfl.nu/wv53
  Replies (4) Good night (1832) Bad night (445)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year

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  (519): So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year http://tfl.nu/k2mz
  Replies (3) Good night (553) Bad night (216)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..

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  (541): How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time.. http://tfl.nu/mqtf
  Replies (2) Good night (446) Bad night (165)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?

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  (301): Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night? http://tfl.nu/e5g1
  Replies (3) Good night (203) Bad night (981)

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