Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
