I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
