Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
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