She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
