I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
