Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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