Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
