Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Randomize
