best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
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