I'm eating all of the evidence.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
