People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Randomize
