How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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