you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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