Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
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