Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize