you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
