Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
