I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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