I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
Randomize