I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
