I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize