i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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